What Are Feelings?
Feelings are a tender emotional state that develop when a male becomes fixated on a single female to the exclusion of others. Even others with bigger boobs. (is that even possible??)
Early Warning Signs
When you’re around one particular chick, you experience:
- Pounding Heart
- Dry Mouth
- Nausea
- Inability to speak
- Sweating
- Desire to say flattering things
If undiagnosed, these warning signs can quickly develop into the full blown disease…
Symptoms
- Warm fluttery feelings in stomach
- Lightheadedness
- An unexplained urge to watch Love Actually
- Sudden increase in cuddling occurrences
- Brunch cravings
- Happiness
- Failure to notice other hot women
Transmission
Though correlation remains scientifically inconclusive, studies indicate “hand holding” may play a role in spreading Feelings from one person to another.
Treatment
At this time the only treatment for Feelings is a multi-week course in Other Women. If symptoms persist, repeat course at a higher dosage. NOTE: This treatment can result in harmful side-effects such as rash, infection, and in some cases, pregnancy.
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